"...Sissy Meditations"

 

Being a Sissy is to have a particular sensitivity to the world.

I was a Sissy when a young boy. I was called "Sensitive" by my Mother, and Aunts. When I was seven I knew I had a different seeing. A Sissy's seeing.
There was a day in fall. The Sky. The Colors, and swift Clouds of October. I sat in my backyard for hours I think. Just watching.

I was uplifted taken away by the wonder of it. 
This in essence is Sissyhood. The ability to be lost so lost in beauty, and gentleness that you forget who you are where you are when you are. This done without effort. For Queers it just happens.

In most boys, and men it's beaten out of them. It's gone.
However with us it's different. It's who we are. Threaten us beat us all you want we don't lose it won't change 'can't' change.

The Sky will always be beautiful to us, and we will always say so. We will always be taken up, and lost in it.
How many Queer Sissies have been martyred for loving the Sky for loving Color Sweetness, and Gentleness.


(I wrote the below as a dovetail to the meditation.)

"Falling into the Sky"

What would it be like if you fell into the Sky.
Forever, and Forever ,...Tomorrow, and Tomorrow.

Above the Trees above the Towers beyond the Clouds.
I think of falling into Eternity falling into Forever.

One foot in front of the other. One step then another,...

Then,...Falling.

Falling into Heaven.