"...with fries"

Edward G's end time "tastes" are a bit mild. ...see below. Actually I'd like to hear "Heroin" by the Velvet Underground. That with footage from Woodstock, and some of the better Star Trek movies.
Ending has been on my mind of late,...don't call my family. I ain't going anywhere. I'm just say'n is all. 

It's just when I think of kicking the damned bucket I feel such relief.
I mean after near 70 fucking years who wouldn't. I find that I smile at the thought of it. This as I told a shrink once which got me catapulted into the loonie bin. 

Never tell them shit like that,...there's automatic protocols.

However meeting my end now seems like Christmas or my birthday when I was a little kid. Btw I didn't have any after my ninth. Birthday parties. My older brother hated me passionately. ...who knows why? 

He arranged it so no kids on the block would come to that party,...they didn't. My folks were confused they called their parents all that. Eventually they got that it was my then vicious, and now late brother. 

They cut his allowance off for a month. 

It wasn't till he came back from the war that we became actual brothers. His seeing near everyone he knew butchered in front of him in all that hand to hand stuff changed him,...he became human. 'And we 20 years late become brothers.

But I digress.

I was talking about how good I feel about perhaps dropping dead soon. I wonder about how it will be. I mean will it be different from my overdoses.

This where I died during three different hyper-dope events. Shit happened when I left.  Many places at once all that Castaneda stuff.

Except for the last one which was darkness.

I think once the brain really dies there's darkness nothing,...you're gone. The after life is likely these few minutes while you're shutting down, and your physical, and quantum realities end. 

That quantum stuff is probably where all that light gawds relatives, and angel crap is. However that shuts down too, and you become nothing. Like before you were born. 

The up side. 

You don't have to put up with any of this fucked up rancid evil demented shit anymore,...not ever ever ever ever ever again.

So I guess that's Heaven.

More later.