"...Da Newz"

Good evening I'm that guy. Here now da News.

Nationally as the world continues to end there's laffs a'plenty. This as da the Republicans have reorganized themselves as the Delusionalist Nazi Party. Honesty, and goose steps at last. 

Locally everybody has been shot,...so don't go outside.  

Gunshots again, and it's not even summer. Young men everywhere have a whole year of murder rape arson, and assorted suppressed bad vibes to shit out. ...'And they are.

An unofficial "...don't go out, and get ya stupid ass shot" quarantine is in place. Even as the older one still lingers on. Speaking of which. The number of vaccinated folks getting the fucking plague has increased. 

Yeah that's happening. 

Some TV star that got his shots is sick as shit now with the COVID. More every damned day are fucked with it. So we got damned needles for nothing,...figures!

In money news. Republican states are withholding federal unemployment payments in an efforts to force poor people back to their underpaid jobs. Seems they're living better on da dole than working. 'Gee who could have seen that coming.

To rap up.

Da fucking Pentagon has announced that this summer they're coming clean about them UFO Saucer Guys. 

Ya know the one's that have been gutting cows for the hell of it, and fucking red state underclass farmers up the ass. Red fucking neck Kluxer farmers are hoping this will not end their "special relationship" with da space aliens.

In Sports today,...you kidding who gives a fuck?

In Weather,...the world is in a slow motion Extinction Level Event. Your grandchildren are all gonna die in slow horrifying ways. Don't tell them. Let it be a surprise.

And that's the frigging news,...watch ya back comrades.

Stay tuned for the Ralph Chubb Hour" ...in Color. Followed by the "Life, and Times of Harry Hay". 

These on most of our Dumont Sidneytoon Channels.