"...neverland"

I sometimes dream of boyhood friends I never had.

That we all never had, but needed.

...and who needed us.

 

 

"...temporal movement"

 

Time is moving strangely.

Like a river moving east, and west at once.

 

 

"...world view"

 “The Crawling Bleeping Eye!"  …see above in it’s 50′s glory.

My older cousin Jimmy took me to this thing when I was eight or so. ‘Had no idea what the hell was going on in this. Other than them Big Eye things scared the living crap out'a me. Crawling around eat’n folks heads, and all,…spoilers.

I wanted to sleep with Brownie our dog after this. She was like, ”…what’s your problem?” The sticker at the start sez no one under 16 allowed to see da flick. Right. You got a quarter they let you in. Yeah it was just two bits back then. Google da term. 

I wandered into Hitchcock’s “Psycho" too.  I was ten laid two bits on’em they let me in,…business is business. I didn’t know bleep about that one either. It was Saturday, and that meant my ma shoved me in the direction of the kiddie matinee to get me out of her hair. I also saw “South Pacific" that way. This helped with my then budding Queer world view,…Psycho not so much. 

*See trailers below.

 

 

"...dunked"

An early Halloween memory is having my head shoved into the punch bawl at my aunt's by a certain cousin. I think he was trying to be helpful. I found the idea of sticking my face in there to grab an apple with my teeth,...odd.

It'd be much easier now holding my dentures with my hand.

 

"...worlds"

Last night, and tonight we observe Samhain. Halloween. Times when the separation between worlds are thinnest. The ancient belief is other realms usually invisible to us become apparent. Some say spirits roam free between worlds. Last night I dreamt of passed family, and friends. Sights of my childhood home. Time space disjointed. Decades in moments seconds in days.

A safe, and Blessed Samhain to you all.

 

"...stars"

 

Image above from Evelyn Tully Costa.

King Christian, and his wife of Denmark wear the Yellow Star.

Arthur Bass:· The only Nazi occupied European country whose inhabitants were able to successfully resist the Holocaust was Denmark. When the Nazis ordered Danish Jews to wear the star of David sewn on their clothes, the next day almost all Danes took to the streets with exactly the same stars. 

After this event, the order" about the stars" was canceled. 

Later, after learning of the Nazis ’ plans to exterminate the Jews, members of the Danish resistance organized their transportation by sea to Sweden. Only 120 Danish Jews died during the war. Hundreds or even thousands of times less than in other European countries. In the photo - king Christian X with his wife with the stars of David sewn on their clothes. “Bear one another’s burdens, and thus fulfill the law of Christ.”

(Gal.6:2)

Comments from my FB page.

Sirdeepy Frazier:

GRACE AND TRUTH EVERYDAY (G.A.T.E.).

Gary Peterson:

I have read that this photograph is not of the Danish King and Queen, but of a Jewish couple living under Nazi tyranny elsewhere in Europe. King Christian X’s Wikipedia entry includes the following:

King Christian X became the hero of a number of myths about his defense of the Danish Jews. He became the subject of a persistent urban legend according to which, during Nazi occupation, he donned the Star of David in solidarity with the Danish Jews, who were not forced to wear the Star of David. 

However, the legend likely stems from a 1942 British report that claimed he threatened to don the star if this was forced upon Danish Jews, and was popularized when it was included in Leon Uris’s best-selling novel, Exodus. It is important to note that the King did write in his personal diary this entry: 

“When you look at the inhumane treatment of Jews, not only in Germany but occupied countries as well, you start worrying that such a demand might also be put on us, but we must clearly refuse such this due to their protection under the Danish constitution. I stated that I could not meet such a demand towards Danish citizens. If such a demand is made, we would best meet it by all wearing the Star of David.”

The myth may originate from a Swedish newspaper cartoon, in which the King is asked what to do if Nazi-supported prime minister Erik Scavenius makes the Jews wear yellow stars. The King replied that in that case, all Danes would have to wear such stars.

Cassady Smith:

Whether or not this man is the Danish king, let’s all make the pledge NOW that we will all don the yellow stars and declare ourselves to be Jews if Donald Trump gets elected in 2024 and starts making them wear public identifiers. Or if he decides to persecute any OTHER group, publicly and loudly declare ourselves to be leading members of THAT group.

Let’s all take the pledge now, when it’s easy to do because the risk seems low. Demagogues don’t really seem to care which group to scapegoat and persecute. And their slavish followers always seem ready to turn and hate whichever group their told to hate.

When Trump told his followers to hate Asian Americans, I think he was just practicing. How much success did he have? A lot. There was violent assault and battery (of Chinese Americans and every other kind of East Asian) all across the country.

Sidney Smith:

In my childhood many neighbors had green or dark blue numbers etched on their arms. My parents made sure I understood what these meant. Max the guy who ran the stationary store, …here called Candy Stores. The place where I got comic books model planes, and yes candy. He survived a Camp. 

The tailor who made my first suits as a boy our milk man,…milk was delivered to your door back then. The couple that ran the grocery store. Irving who drove the ice cream truck in summer. Also Mrs. Geller from the bakery. She made my birthday cakes. All these had survived the Camps. All these wore numbers. This is not remote history. I knew spoke with was given kindness by these, and many who saw, and lived literal hell upon this earth. I learned from them. I am grateful to them.

* Addendum: 

Given how I, and many grew up, and with who. We see the rise of Trump, and his movement with different eyes perhaps than some in this country.

"...Darwin"

I got my COVID/Delta booster shot this morning. Easy as pie. Tho’ in some parts drama, and mayhem. One of the nurses at the site said she’d given up trying to understand it. Sez she her job is to save lives. Refusenik area hospitals are overwhelmed with cases. Brooklyn w/Vaccine went from a Virus Red Zone to just fine thanks. We adapted. Darwin wins that guy always wins.

This flick portrayed the COVID Pandemic

near exactly. They were only off on 

the percentage that would die.

“…Digital World War”

An Uncle Sidney Public Service Announcement. 

Sites all over FB, and other platforms are gathering demographic info by asking innocent questions. Your favorite movie your music when you started voting cultural ethnic questions. All put in friendly ways. 

Answer, and they have your IP your age your social class political, and cultural biases. We are in a Digital World War, and we’re all conscripts. 

So be aware.

 

"...forever"

Just above us every day every night,...Eternity.

Forever or part of it as seen from my fire escape observatory.

 

"...foc"

'Put a note on my window, and left it open a crack for Peter Pan.

A simple missive: "Dear Pete hope all is well

on that island republic of deranged mayhem you run.

Look could you do me a solid, and,...

Get me the Fuck Out'a Here?!"

Thanks your pal Syd.

 

 

"...Boo!"

From my FB pal

Michael Hinchman.

Have a Happy Halloween!

 

 

 "Eh,..."

All Creatures Great, and Small. What would an alien species make of our Literature art politics theologies or we of theirs. If they had any. Another evolutionary tree would cook up unique pathologies. Imagine if the folks from Planet X took our books, and theater politics theologies as solid realities. Suppose their neural wiring can't make the leap from fact to fantasy. Granted folks here have problems with this as well, but bear with me.

These saucer guys would likely say: "...Holy fucking shit these weird folks can create whole worlds whole new realities just like that!" No amount of our telling them it's just made up bullshit will help. From Bugs Bunny to religions to commercials our Alien pals take the lot at face value. 

The implications for robbing these rubes blind are on the overwhelming side tempting. What an interesting profitable, and for them terrifying ride our relationship will be.

"No Gort ya just don't get it!" 

"Look we just made that bullshit up. Made up as in ain't for real. No that Santa guy Godzilla,...yeah even Batman,...no they ain't real. Eh you getting this? No you can't speak to Wonder Woman about it,...not Zeus neither." Lady Gaga. Um,...well she's part real. Remember I told you about actors. No you can't speak to Bob Hope,...not Fritz Lang neither or that robot."

“…ghost walker”

A friend mentioned a book to me. “The Language of Flowers” I have that title. It was was of the few items I took with me to the street. It’s a small joyful book. Flowers their names how they got them, and their place in artistic mythology. Tho' battered I still have it.

As in a scene from a movie. I was resting,…not sleeping such is suicide out there. It began to snow. My first night in snow. Insulated with news papers I read the story of flowers.

That would be a tear jerking scene.

I can hear the heartful music. Ya has to know how to work an audience. Though at the time I was just trying to stay warm, and sane. The dramatic possibilities came much later.

This among the reasons I never did that play. The one act performance of my Houseless year. Always seemed manipulative.

I didn’t, and don’t want pity.

I wanted to know how people could be thrown away. Their worth stripped from them. They become ghost walkers. Unseen. Then as now I want to be seen. We are all living aware beings. We must be acknowledged as being alive, and of value.

"...two tone"

I remember a China town apartment. I’m laying on the rug beneath a portrait of Chiang Kai-shek. This with Chinese nationalist flags about it. I was playing with wind-up toys Grandma had got for me,…probably from Mott Street. Of our very early lives we just have unconnected images. Knowledge of the complications come later. Given our multi-ethnic family. We all thought as kids that a mommy could have a baby of any color. It was sure happening in front of us.

Also about the name change on my Maternal side. This from Wong to Cameron. Seems our Great-grands took the name of a friend of the family because it sounded more American. Other American ethnics did the same back then. In our case it was to downplay our Chinese heritage and emphasize the Negro.

This to get around immigration restrictions in the 1920’s. At the time this country was very hostile to Asians. This is happening again. American racism was, and is complicated. Color tone gradations, and nationality. One needed a slide rule.

For a while in parts of the States it was actually safer being Black than Yellow. The heritage of the attempted genocide of the Natives Peoples, and the Slavery of Blacks distorted the American Experiment. We are still slowly so slowly recovering.

See flags. I have family in both China's. The Mainland, and Taiwan.

I also have kin in both America's. Texas, and Brooklyn.

The American race game changes from generation to generation. The game is near it’s end hence the extremes of confusions, and hostilities. Give it another generation or two to calm down. Then we can all agree on the real enemy,…the French.

Flag of the pro-Nazi

Vichy French.

These morons are about to elect a Trump Clone.

The French,...figures.

"...Aw Crap!!!"

Here we go again. An early Nor'easter,...Coastal Storm for folks out in the world. These usually hold off till the snows. Strong winds, and two" to five" inches of rain depending. See orange on da map,...I'm sitting in the middle of it like last time. I'd bring ya animals, and surviving plants in.

Okay it's a few hours later the shit is here. That Nor'easter is kicking in. Hell in a handbasket here in the Emerald City. Rain roaring loudly now. Winds starting up. You folks in town'n the region stand fast.

"...Curiouser, and Curiouser"

Was yucky for many days got real interesting after 3:00am so called 911. 'Was barfing blood. Always a sure sign you're not having a good time. Bleep always happens around three. Always. The EMT folks were swell. I want to be one when I grow up. I kind of passed out on da way. I still think I just fell asleep. This got me serious attention when they shoveled out of the meat wagon.

Years ago I had an operation for similar stuff. Was in hospital for near a month. When admitted the tree outside my suite had snow. When discharged it's first buds., ...Swell.

Da upside it wasn't that. Just a real bad acid re-flux. ...seriously bad. Such interesting times we've entered. Anyway they tested drew blood gave me meds let me sleep, and here I am back to piss you off. Thank you Medicare. Another upside I made an appointment for the COVID/Delta booster. See below,...my latest Heroes.

 

 "...shot dead"

 

I found this online handy list of helpful instructions for Negros. Make a copy, and review it constantly.

“…it all comes down to not resisting arrest.”

Don’t stop resisting arrest. Never stop resisting resisting arrest. Also, don’t put your hands up. Police view this as deadly force. If you do put your hands up especially when ordered by police you will be shot dead.

Don’t walk to the store walk on the street drive a car ride a bus or train especially don’t sit on a park bench. These in many circumstances these are viewed as capital offences. Don’t defend yourself. while walking home unarmed.  A white vigilante stalking you in an SUV with loaded guns will see that as just cause to kill you. The police, but especially judges will agree.

If you insist on being a Negro working  in a gas station. Don’t play your music. A white man who might not share your particular musical preferences. They’ll call the police who may, and have at times shot Negros dead for this offense.

Don’t defend yourself. Not ever in any circumstance as this will be seen as attempted murder on your part. Don’t commit petty misdemeanors,…well you shouldn’t anyway. However this usually gets small fines or verbal warnings if you’re white. If you ain’t that can, and will get you shot in the face. Also, don’t mind your own business and be sure to mind your own business. Don’t obey or disobey the laws.

Don’t drive a car. Don’t question white authority. Don’t show too much deference to white authority as this seems fishy. Don’t ever question any white man woman or child. This can get you killed.

Don’t stay home hiding in your house. Police will kick your door in, and kill you. Then they’ll find out they had the wrong address. They’ll have a good laugh then go next door, and kill the right Negro.

Everything above has in recent times happened. It’s still happening, and will continue to happen.  So please keep this list with you at all times. Unless the police find it assume you’re subversive, and shoot you on general principal.

Otherwise have a nice day, and Happy Halloween.

 

 

 

"...noodles"

Just sitting tonight watching the traffic go by.

Tummy yuckie had soup.

So far so good.

 

 

 

"...Our Lady of the Burning Leaf"

 

 "Samhain"

 "Angry Witches, and the Yule Ram"

It is time to call upon 'all' forces 

to defeat the Darkness.

"...speed"

Besides the bleep we're all stuck with these days.

I have near terminal

Depressions.

To deal with this I write sleep stare,

and take doll glam shots.

Then hours of digital post production. 

Took all afternoon getting 

Sunshine Barbie up there in shape.

Who knows why no one cares, but I do it.

I went off meds, and had cake,...the sugar kind.

If I had speed or coke I'd have done that too.

We're on a sinking ship so why not.

Otherwise have a nice day.

Btw Happy Halloween.

 

 "...Flow"

A few photos I took while "Houseless" on the Outside.

There are many morning shots because come dawn I had to clear out. The alley shown is one of where I rested,...not slept. This till my sister put me up in hotels while a home could be found, and renovated.

Even then I'd crouch, and doze in the corner of the hotel room. Laying down was not done. On the street such is suicide. I'd position myself so I could see every angle out there. Even in a four star hotel I listened for movement.

The habit was with me for years after. That first hotel night I felt heard 86 movements. I remember because I wrote it into a journal I kept. I had meant one day to do a one person act based on it. I never did.

I left or tried to leave it behind me. It was a long while before I could sleep in a bed. Longer before I stopped counting sounds.

Try that. Count the movements that surround you.

You will find that even birds have shadows.

This will give you a sense of the outside. I don't write these notes to upset. I write because I must. Sometimes like now it just comes back. Like a memory of war. I can't stop it only flow with it.

 

"...Arf"

I remember our dog Brownie from when I was little. She was swell,…mostly. She’d cook do the laundry go shopping even the post office. Brownie used to do my math homework, and type letters to grandma for me. She’d write checks for the electric bill, and vacuum the rugs. That, and play with us. She was cool. 

Times have changed, and not for the better. These days dogs just sit around sleeping complaining, and eating all the time. Heck dogs today don’t even bother to vote. This after all the trouble they went through back in the 70’s to get the damned thing. Well at least they’ve stopped talking. Brownie tho’ cool would never shut up. All day all night she’d yack about the Dodgers Milton Berle or how much she hated the cat next door. We had to lock her in the basement, but she would bang on the door threatening to turn us in to the IRS. She did our taxes too. 

Dear Brownie finally kicked the bucket one morning at dog age of 348,…one tough dog. She wanted us put up a big bleeping shrine to her in the yard,…with blinking neon lights. ‘Course we said we would, but actually we just buried her behind the garage. She’s probably waiting in Dog Heaven to give us crap about that.

Cats are another matter. Hint keep sharp objects your credit cards, and the car keys out’a their paws. The up side they mind their own business, and don’t need you for anything. Otherwise,…well I tried to get one to help me with the Times crossword. She just looked at me yawned, and went back to sleep. Right.

Btw I just checked my mail. Social Services informs me I may have died several years ago. I had a feeling something was wrong. Anyway they want to to come down, and register as such. Seems I get to vote twice now.  Stay tuned.

"...October"

First of all, it was October, a rare month  for boys, full of cold winds, long nights, dark promises. Days get short. The shadows lengthen. The wind warms in such a way, you want to run forever through the fields, because up ahead, 10,000 pumpkins lie waiting to be cut.

It was the October of my 12th year when the seller of lightning rods came along the road toward Green Town, Illinois, sneaking glances over his shoulder. Somewhere not far back was a terrible storm. Even now, on those special autumn days, when the air smells like smoke and the twilights are orange and ash gray, my mind goes back to Green Town, the place where I grew up.

In my memory, I’m back on Main Street again, among the neighbors who gave me my first glimpses into the fearful needs of the human heart.

“Something Wicked this way Comes”

Ray Bradbury